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Obligatory Matrix Review

Published May 19, 2003
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Well, we had a couple of hours of babysitter-overlap yesterday, so Shelly and I decided to take in the new Matrix movie.

I don't agree with the PVP-guy that it's "Highlander 2". To me, it was more like "Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom". While "Highlander 2" dispensed entirely with the continuity established in first film thinking it could do better (and instead doing much worse), the second Matrix just tried to up the ante in every department (ala the second Indy movie) and pretty-much failed on every front (also like the second Indy movie).

Somebody definitely needs to convince the Washingmachine Brothers that they are completely incapable of writing dialogue that doesn't come off as bad soap-opera-speak or fourth rate L. Ron Hubbard philosophizing. It eventually grew amusing watching characters speak deadpan lines that would make Ed Wood cringe. Especially Larry Fishburne and the pointless Italian chick in the white dress. I had to suppress a laugh during a couple of their ridiculous monologues.

Keanu wisely chose to speak about 40 words during the entire movie, so he didn't come off as badly. I think Keanu was doing the opposite of William Shatner during his "Star Trek" days, fighting with the directors to get fewer lines and to give some of his lines to other actors :)

It wasn't completely bad. It certainly had a couple of shining moments. But where it was bad it was really really bad.

Also, maybe I'm becoming jaded, but the fight and car scenes just weren't that exciting. Much of the computer animation was obvious, and the gratuitous "Neo versus a hundred badguys" fight scene looked like a Havok physics demo. "Agent Smith" has now gone from being an unstoppable killing machine to this guy who just keeps running at you while you repeatedly push him away.

Also, the robot squids simply aren't scary. They just look silly.
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